This morning I had the great privilege of waking up early to spend some time at my local Department of Motor Vehicles office.  See, because I recently moved from the state of Washington to the beautiful state of Idaho, I was invited to come down to the DMV, retake my written drivers test, and get the fantastic prize of a newly issued Idaho State driver's license.  Oh... and they best part?  Because I am a resident, but do not have a mortgage or rental agreement or any bills with my name on them (due to the fact that I'm shacking up with my boyfriend), my ever so willing sweetheart was obligated to tag along as my proof of residency.  He was thrilled.

I've spent a little time at DMV offices before, and truthfully I would rather have my eyes clawed out by a herd of rabid cats than spend any time at any DMV... ever.  Oh... and I heard the horror stories about this particular office.  Everybody and anybody that knew I was heading down there had to tell me stories about how awful their experience or experiences were at that office.  Needless to say, I was overflowing with restless anticipation.

So I walked into the office this morning, holding tightly to my boyfriend's hand.  I don't know if I was holding him so tight because I was scared, or if it was because I thought there was a chance he might try and run.... but I definitely had a hold of him.  He was not going anywhere.  If I was going down in a government office, I was taking him with me.

Yeah, so there we were… just inside the door of the office.  I immediately assessed the situation.  Apparently Wednesday morning at 8:30 is the perfect time to go to the DMV.  There were only about 4 non-employed people in the office, and all were being assisted at the front counter.  However, I didn't get my hopes up.  I started looking around for one of those number dispensing contraptions.  I didn’t see one.  I didn’t even see that lighted red number sign that lets you know that you are still like 150 people away from being helped.  As I frantically searched around for something familiar, a non-abrasive voice from down the counter called out "I can help you down here." 

WHAT?!?  I walk in the DMV office and I am immediately assisted?  Inconceivable!  I mean, this is unheard of... right?  Now I was confused, still scared, a little cold, but mostly confused.

At this particular DMV, the countertops where you stand to be helped are about "bottom of your tits high", but the employees all sit at standard height desks behind them.  So I was unable to see the person until I walked right up to the counter.  At that point, I think I was expecting a human version of grumpy cat or maybe even Roz from Monster's Inc. sitting at that computer desk in front of me.  However, that wasn't the case.  I had the most pleasant woman help me.  She didn't bark orders at me, she didn't get irritated with any of my silly questions, and she didn't even roll her eyes when I told her my weight or hair color.  Hell, she even laughed when she had to take my photo 3 times because apparently when I smile for the camera my eyes feel the need to try and close.  In fact the entire office, including my boyfriend, got quite a chuckle when she had to tell me "Okay, now smile, but this time not so big!" 

Yes, that's right.  They allow laughter at this particular DMV. 

All and all, the whole experience was pleasant.  Dare I say... it was even pleasurable?  It didn't take long, everything went smoothly, and we even had a few laughs.    

Oh, and although I hadn't taken any sort of drivers test since I was 16 years old... and I had no idea about things like the laws when sharing the road with ATVs, horseback riders and cattle.... I still managed to ace my test. 

That's right Idaho.  I'm on the road and I’m legal, so get the hell out of my way.  Beep! Beep!!

This is what happens when I am asked to smile "but not as big" as what comes naturally to me.  I look like I'm scared... or I'm up to something... or I just farted and I'm trying to look natural as I casually walk out of the room. 

And apparently I grew a double chin overnight... 

I think I can see a vein sticking out of my neck...  

My eyes are still squinty...


Sara Bunke
10/23/2013 4:46pm

Omg Tera!!!!!!! LMAO!!!! Thanx for this lady!


Leave a Reply.